Thursday, May 11, 2017

A Grandmother's Love

A visit to my home where I grew up. A place dear to my heart with many imperfections but yet so perfect. I wrote this years ago. My daughter is now almost 11. 

Home...  My grandmother passed away Nov. 18, 2010. 95 years of age.  She retired from her job as a RN when I was 6 weeks old and kept me when my mother went back to work. My childhood memories are filled with her smile and kindness, her humor, and her love. I still miss her and often wish I could talk to her about things that are going on in my life.



  I stopped by my mom's today. I decided to wander around the yard to pass the time until my mom made it home from work. I hadn't explored it in a long while. I walked the same steps that I had walked many times before as a child when growing up there.
  It's a very large yard with much room for running, playing, adventure, and many great times spent while growing up. We spent a lot of our time out of doors enjoying all the beauties and great adventures it had to offer. Building club houses, riding bicycles, playing in the sprinklers, hiking through the woods. Yes... I'm a country girl and proud of it. I'm thankful for the experiences it gave me.  The wonderful times we had. I so hope to find a place like this for our family one day so that my own children can build these great memories too.

   The air smelled of grass and flowering trees. I enjoyed their fragrance and beauty. The yard was cut nicely. When my siblings and I lived at home, we use to all pitch in and make the yard look its finest. 
  Home really is a heart place. It's the only place were my emotions and memories run so very deep.  Anywhere I go now doesn't yet feel quite like home. Walking around the yard, I smelled the sweet fragrance of honeysuckle. Delighted by this, I searched out it's location.  Finding them in a heap, The sight and smell was so familiar and comforting, that I might of hugged the blossoms if it had not been for the thorns from the wild berry vines that were also entangled with them.  
   Walking along beside me, was my daughter. Soon to be turning four on her next birthday. What a blessing that she too could see the same beautiful things that I was seeing. There have been 5 generations to live here. To think that my great grandparents had built here first. It was an old house with a true dog trot and then later they rebuilt. Several had crossed this path before me. Wishing I could go back and make peanut butter cookies one more time with my great grandmother or taste her blackberry gobbler. To spend a day on her porch and help hang sheets on her line. 
  Like a breath of peace taken in and a sense of sorrow leaving out. How time passes so quickly. Bitter sweet. The trees still sway in their same way, the old barn still stands remarkably but much wobblier than before, I'm sure. And the wood old and weathered. What some might find ugly but in my eyes it's beautiful. 

  I love coming home but often find it difficult to bare at the same time. Seeing my mother and grandmother growing older. Some of the dearest people to my heart. Especially my grandmother getting on in her years. 94 perhaps. She's always been very secretive about her exact age. 
  I stopped over to see her. Not a far distance from my moms. Just a short trail away.  I use to scurry across the path at night as a little girl in my gown. As my grandmother so very well tells it, knocking on the door and asking, "if I could sleep on her bed tonight." I loved staying over at her house. I'd get a pile of books and stack them on the bed to read at bedtime. She taught me how important it was to floss my teeth every night. In the morning she would make me cinnamon toast but sometimes cheese toast or a scrambled egg and coffee. It was instant coffee but I loved it. I'd spend time coloring while she knitted.
   My daughter and I sat with my grandmother on her front porch waitng for my mom to arrive home. The wind chimes clanging, the birds chirping, the carpenter bees buzzing, the dogs panting, and a nice breeze blowing every now and again. The best company.
  She says she's been looking for us a home in the area because she wants to see my daughter grow up. I don't think it would surprise me a bit if she managed to stick around many more years.
   After visiting with my grandmother and my mom, my daughter and I left to return home. A visit like many that I will collect like charms and hold dear to my heart. Once again back to the now life and in a way leaving home to carry on.

Love, Peace, and Sweet Memories to You!